Creative Blog #6: Last day of school is fast approaching

I'm pretty excited for school to be over. I've been stressed out for so long and now I can finally relax.
I'll miss my friends of course, but i'll see them outside of school before I go off to college. I'll also miss some of my teachers. They definitely helped me grow as a student.
But I definitely won't miss the stress this school has caused me and those darn stairs I had the pleasure of falling down....
Sometimes I wonder what my life would've been like if I went to Oakwood or Crossroads instead of Buckley. I probably wouldn't have had the same experience.
Anyways, I feel like I'm ready to leave Buckley. I know some people are sad to graduate but I've never been so ready to leave in my entire life.

So good bye everyone.

Creative Blog #5: The AP expirience

This was my first year taking AP classes and for the most part it wasn't too bad. First semester I felt like my head was going to explode from all the reading and memorization I had to do for both AP Gov and AP Enviro. I really didn't think I would be able to handle all the stress that came from taking college level courses. But around 4th quarter, I proved to myself that I could actually do it.

I think the worst part about APs is actually STUDYING for the AP test. Actually taking the test is the easy part. You get to show up in free dress and miss all of your classes. It's pretty nice. Especially the feeling of freedom and relief once you've finished the test.

I'm so glad I didn't push myself to fill my schedule with really challenging classes. I had a decent amount of classes that challenged me and a decent amount of classes that were super easy for me *cough*french*cough*

I'm also proud of myself for seeing both of my AP classes to the bitter end. I'm pretty sure I passed both of my APs so hopefully I'm exempt from taking certain classes in college.

Creative Blog #4: My last Buckley fair

I was somewhat sad yesterday when I realized I was going to my last Buckley fair. Every move I made, I kept telling myself "oh this is the last time i'll ever go on the tilt a whirl" or "Oh this is the last time I'll ever watch Buckley's battle of the bands" or "oh this is the last time I'll almost trip on an electrical cord while searching for my friends."
I remember the first time I went to the fair back in 2007. I was just accepted at Buckley and I went as a part of a welcome new students bagel breakfast. There I met Madeline Fuhrman and Marika Cleto as we were about to go on this spinning black ride.
So I guess I'll miss the fair. No wait, I'll miss all the memories I've had every time I've gone to the fair.

Creative Blog #3: Just keep your head above: how a jack's mannequin song inspired me to never give up

“Just keep your head above,” I say to myself every time I feel nervous about something. It seemed like every day my French theatre director yelled at me for messing up my lines. He had the ability to make a beautiful language like French sound more like nails on a chalkboard. Usually, I am quick to memorize my lines, but this time the words aren’t in English. I could only understand every other word of what I was mechanically reciting to my scene partner. The director kept saying “Merde! Merde! Merde!” while kicking a trash can in frustration. I never knew what that meant, but I had a feeling it didn’t mean fantastic. 

There are times when I wanted to quit and offer to work behind the scenes while my friends shined on stage. Then I remembered my favorite song, Swim by Jack’s Mannequin, and I knew that I shouldn’t give up without a fight. The lyric that resonates with me the most is “You gotta swim and swim when it hurts. The whole world is watching. You haven't come this far to fall off the earth.” I worked very hard to get accepted into the Experiment in International Living and I wasn’t going to let anyone, not even the director, stop me from giving it my all onstage. Besides, I came this far to study theatre so failure was not an option.

This song always reminds me to keep going. Even when all hope is lost and the situation looks grim, just keep swimming. If I “keep my head above” the problem, then sooner or later I will succeed. I love how the song shifts to a more urgent tone towards the end: “There's no shame in drifting. Feel the tide shifting and wait for the spark,” as if the writer of the song, Andrew McMahon, is telling listeners that it’s okay to wait for the right moment to strike and swim again. He wrote this song about his battle with leukemia and how he defied the odds and survived by never giving up. I know that if he could find the horizon despite all hardships, I can do the same. So I’ll always keep my head above and swim. 

Creative Blog #2: College t shirt day

It was fun except for the excruciatingly long photo taking process. I swear I've never seen so many bad photos of me as I have now. And of course they're all on the internet for everyone to see. :/
I was shocked when I saw some people in my grade's college choices. But whatever, if they think that's the school for them...then that's great. I won't judge.
I was a little disappointed though. I didn't hear as many toothpaste jokes as I thought I would. I guess people are either A) more mature than I thought or B) out of material or C) just didn't care. Personally I think it was C.
Anyways I'm excited to go off to college. I know for a lot of people this is a scary time but I don't think I've ever been so prepared to leave California as I am now. I can't wait for all the new experiences headed my way and I'm sure I will be fine. If anything happens I'll just transfer schools. But I really like Colgate and the people who did know about it had nothing but great things to say about the people who go there and the school itself.

First creative blog: My bucket list for college

1. To meet someone at Colgate who loves Jack's Mannequin/Something Corporate as much as myself.
2. To remain organized throughout my four years in college.
3. To turn in all of my work on time and to not forget dead lines. (aka not forgetting to blog before the deadline passes...my bad)
4. To take as many interesting classes and join as many clubs as I can without going overboard.
5. To NOT procrastinate.
6. To get discounts on colgate toothpaste and all oral hygienic products.
7. To study abroad (mainly in France).
8. To become fluent in French and maybe Spanish and Italian.
9. To not misplace any of my belongings.
10. To have a stress-free 4 years.
11. To get a job or a paid internship sometime during my sophomore/junior year.

Just because i felt like it

I can't stop laughing at Rebecca Black's friends who can't dance

 

Just another example of how talentless people can make it in America while the rest of us are stupid enough to support their careers.

Creative Blog numero deux

Sorry this is the LAST time I'm going to talk about conformity:

But I wanted to talk about how conforming the music industry is. During the early 20th century, artists had to rely on their talent and not their overall image in order to gain success in the music industry. But thanks to technological advances in society such as television and the internet, musicians have to focus on having a certain look and because of this, being talented appears to be less of an issue especially since computers can make anyones voice sound decent. While true musicians have to work hard just to get a record deal or even to be heard in front of an audience, lousy singers can gain instant stardom by simply posting a YouTube video. I find it sad that we pay so much attention to people like Rebecca Black (who can barely hold a note even with the help of a computer), we tend to ignore true singers and songwriters.
I know you're wondering, where does the conformity fit into my post? Well, here's my point: Having an image is actually conformity because an artist has to be who they think society will gravitate towards in order to capture an audiences attention and make money. And in my opinion, the biggest conformist of them all is Lady Gaga. She appears to be the most nonconforming person in the world because of all the bizarre outfits she wears but she only does this in order to gain attention. And it works perfectly. If she were to be who she really is (aka Stefani Germanotta) without all the costumes and wigs then she wouldn't be nearly as popular as she is now. Hell, we probably wouldn't know who she is today. The sad part is that she's a really talented girl underneath it all. But sadly the music industry isn't ready to embrace a soulful brunette girl from New York. So she must continue conforming to what todays society wants.

Creative Blog numero un

After writing my essay on the topic of conformity, I've learned a lot about love and different people's views on it. For example, I interviewed my grandfather about the conformity in love and marriage and what he told me was very interesting. People during my grandpas felt pressured to get married at a certain age and work standard 9-5 jobs while people from my generation feel less inclined to follow such standards. But still conformity exists and will continue to exist unless there is a massive resistance. The same message can be applied to Kafka's Metamorphosis. Gregor Samsa's conformist ways are what ultimately kills him and if his younger sister Grete doesn't learn from Gregor's mistake, she too will suffer the same fate. The cycle will continue itself unless she stands up to her parents and society by deciding to be an individual.

Intro for essay

Conformity is everywhere. From school settings to at home, we can't escape the pressure society puts on us. In fear of being an outcast, we're forced to conform to what society wants us to be. This is definitely true when it comes to love and marriage. Love used to be the main reason people get married. But now, wealth, connivance, and pressure are factors that convince two people into getting married despite being in love or not. In Jane Austen's Pride & Prejudice, Elizabeth and Darcy coming from two different classes had to suppress their love for each other in order to maintain social normality. The more we conform, the more we lose our identities and our rights to love whomever we want. Even if we don't want to get married and start a family, society forces us to feel guilty for making that choice. Thanks to outside pressures such as family, religion, and society, marriage appears to no longer be a choice but an obligation one must fulfill in order to gain acceptance.

Conformity in the classroom

I feel like one of the main places where conformity easily spreads is in the classroom. We're all forced to look the same and follow the same set of rules. In a way, we even think the same. Teachers mostly feed us the answers that eventually we end up regurgitating in an essay or discussion. Even this post is somewhat repeating everything that was said in our class discussion.
Conformity starts at such a young age that by the time we reach college, we're too blind to realize that we're just sheep. Speaking of college, parents, faculty, college counselors, and pretty much most of society pressure us to want to go to college. So much so, that we sacrifice our sanity in order to get the best grades and test scores possible. If someone were to say that he didn't want to go to college, he would be looked down upon. What society wants us to be and who we really are deep down inside are two contrasting ideas battling each other. I think schools should focus on the students coming up with their own ideas and answers instead of hearing the teacher's opinion which is often one-sided. This country needs more free thinkers and less like mindless drones.

Essay Idea

My essay is going to focus on conformity in terms of love and marriage. Society pressures us to want to get married at a certain age and have children. If one chose not to want any of these things, he/she would be considered weird. I also want to mention how people tend to date and marry people in their race, social class, and/or religion. For me, love has no race, gender, social status or religion. But I'm sure for others, they feel pressured by their family and society to conform and marry who they are supposed to love. (I'll probably talk about arranged marriages and stuff...) I think I will interview people of different backgrounds and age groups in order to get diverse answers.

Blog Questions 1&4

1. The illustrations of Kafka's Metamorphosis differ from one another. Mairowitz and Crumb's illustrations are more realistic and remain true to the story while Kuper's version is darker and more vivid. Kuper also depicts Gregor having a human-like head on the body of a bug showing that Gregor hasn't completely lost himself during the transformation. The illustrations in a way confirm my interpretation of the novella; however, the two artists took liberties in changing certain parts of each scene and adding their own interpretations of how the characters look and act therefore distorting Kafka's original work. The way I envisioned Metamorphosis somewhat conflicts with their illustrations. Kuper might've chose to illustrate in black and white rather in color because it represents conformity. Colors are unique and depict happiness and cheer while black and white is simple, lacks individuality, and is gloomy/depressing. This is why his choice was so effective because it made an impact on the overall mood of the graphic novel.

4. Kuper is more sympathetic towards Gregor because he illustrates Gregor as being stuck in a dead-end job forced to work for a man who treats him poorly. Kafka focuses more on the conformist side of Gregor instead of focusing on the reasons why he enjoys conformity. Moreover, the father's attitude towards Gregor in Kafka's novella is not as harsh as Kuper's drawing of him violently beating Gregor with his cane. In a way, humor can be found in Gregor's metamorphosis since he turns into the very creature he's acted like all his life. I find that there is more humor in the illustrations of Metamorphosis than in the novella. The illustrations of the family's and the manager's reactions to Gregor being a bug appeared comical rather than serious.

WHAT IF YOU WOKE UP AS A “VERMIN”?

I know for one thing, I would not be able to carry on through my day after discovering I was a giant bug. I understand maybe at first being in denial and thinking the whole situation was just a dream. But after a few seconds of realizing that I can't walk or speak, I'd accept that I was a bug and I'd try to get my body back to normal.
My initial thoughts would probably be "what did I eat last night to make me turn into a bug?" Then after analyzing everything I did the night before, I'd come up with excuse to why I can't come outside until I was human again...
Gregor doesn't have more wakeful and responsive thoughts because he's so used to his daily routine that he doesn't know how to comprehend change. Honestly, if I lived a life exactly like Gregor's I'd probably react the same way.

Wealth, Morality, & The Reality Behind Conrad’s Heart of Darkness

Where a person resides on the social scale is often related with moral upbringing and overall behavior. In Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, Conrad demonstrates through his characters how this common belief is clearly false. Kurtz grew up in a decent household, had a good education, and is at the top of the social scale. Marlow, however, does not have the advantages that Kurtz has. He is more of a drifter who has yet to discover himself. Normally, one would assume that Kurtz having a better life and a stronger education would have a stronger moral code than someone like Marlow. But the reality is, Marlow retains his values while Kurtz abandons them in his quest for power. Ultimately, this will be Kurtz’s downfall. Through Kurtz and Marlow, Conrad demonstrates how wealth and social statuses don’t determine moral codes; instead, people are born with a good versus evil complex and it’s up to them to listen to their conscience or to follow the id.


--I realized I didn't post my intro paragraph....whoops

Question #1: Interpret one symbol first at the surface, literal level and then as if it were a symbol in a dream vocabulary with a deeper, secondary meaning

In Joseph Conrad's novel, Heart of Darkness, Conrad uses a vast amount of images to symbolize the complex nature of Africa and its people. As colonists pour in from different European countries to the continent of Africa, there is visual proof that Africa and Africans reject European thought and technology. A prime example of that is a railway truck Marlow finds up on a hill: "The thing looked as dead as the carcass of some animal. I came upon more pieces of decaying machinery, a stack of rusty rails." (379). The truck is compared to a dying animal to demonstrate Marlow's sympathy towards what the Europeans are doing in Africa. The reader can easily identify where his loyalty lies. Symbolically, the railway truck is more than a "dead animal" but a sign that Africa is not like Europe and therefore should be left alone. Technology being turned over is only a warning sign; the colonists should heed these warnings because they could easily be turned over too. The fact that the truck is on top of a hill means that the wreckage is closer to heaven and can be interpreted as God himself playing an intricate role in shunning unwanted colonists and ideas out of Africa.

Essay Ideas on Heart of Darkness

My (scattered) thoughts and ideas on the topic of symbolism and how psychoanalysis helps us make sense of these symbols:
In the Joseph Conrad's story, The Heart of Darkness, Conrad uses many symbols to portray his character.
Kurtz, for example, is a brilliant man whose only downfall is that he lacks restraint against temptation. Once he's away from England, Kurtz disregards British rule and does whatever he wants, including the mistreatment of the natives in order to obtain more ivory. He is an ironic character because a man of such intelligence and high stature is ignorant enough to fall victim to his desires.
Marlow's journey down the Congo maybe foreshadows a path leading him and Kurtz to disaster. The dark imagery connotes a sinister life or maybe even death. The withering of the water represents the decay of society and their own lives.

psychological significance of journey

In Joseph Conrad's story, Heart of Darkness, the main character Marlow not only goes through a journey physically but mentally. His prejudices about Africans are prevalent in the things he says; however, Marlow demonstrates the ability to change through his recognition of right from wrong. Towards the beginning of the story he refers to the continent of Africa as a “God-forsaken wilderness.” Even though he voices his racist or ignorant opinion often, Marlow appears to be more ethical than his peers. For example, he shows sympathy towards the natives being mistreated by the settlers which means he has a strong moral code. Since Marlow is still battling his early prejudices against his morals, he still has a long journey to go before he can become enlightened.

Question #6 p. 430

The painting of "a woman, draped and blindfolded, carrying a lighted torch" symbolizes how imperialism supposedly helps the natives by guiding them to civilization and truth (which is symbolized as a lighted torch). A woman being blindfolded usually represents justice being blind to all prejudices; however, the idea of a superior country conquering others because they are "primitive" is anything but justice. Instead, the blindfolded woman could represent the blind leading the blind because the imperialist nations are just as or even more ignorant and blind to the truth than the natives they want to "save."

Marlow would agree somewhat with this message because he is very critical towards imperialism. In his mind, he views that the natives and even the continent of Africa reject European "improvement"; therefore, they should leave the people to continue being savage and misguided. After witnessing a fight between the natives and the imperialists, Marlow realizes how cruel mankind can be towards one another.

Heart of Darkness Question Number 2

Marlow begins his tale of a journey to the heart of darkness with an account of London to demonstrate his feelings of uneasiness and uncertainty by comparing his voyage to the Romans traveling to a gloomy and mysterious place like London. The English traveling to Africa had no idea what to expect; to them, Africa is a wild and dangerous place. The repetition of dark words such as "brooding gloom" paints an ominous picture in the reader's mind. Similarly, the Romans felt that London was also a primitive place which was why they used London as a place of exile.